Forgot to mention that my ideal recluse would look like George Clooney, David Gandy or Glen Powell and would relocate me to Paris, Lake Como, or Bali. I'm not picky. TIA.
Thanks! And yes, I forgot to mention, a wealthy recluse need not be older, they can be a young up-and-coming Hollywood A-lister like Glen Powell -- dream big!!
Ornamental hermit was on my original list of careers but the schools careers adviser said the market was pretty much flooded and I’d be better off going into retail. Sorry about the roundworm. If you want to hook me up with Gregorio’s network I can pay you back with a pair of sneaky sandals. Also, Dickens. Mid. Thank you.
It's never too late to pivot to ornamental hermiting! I'll gladly set up you with a wealthy noble in exchange for those sandals -- the Ivermectin is doing a number on my liver
How about this instead: I will lease you one of my 377 $100K True Fans at 6% interest. We can start at 10 years and go adjustable rate thereafter. He will be a perfect fit for your unique chuckle to laugh-out-loud (C-LOL) ratio.
Note that I write "he" not because there aren't "she's" available – there's a bevy – but because I have a True Fan in mind that I sense is growing a bit weary of my writing. It's important to have a feeling for this if you want to grow your business into anything resembling my own.
If desired, I can send you complete samples of "his" True Fan comment writing style along with a personality assessment that considers relationship commitment, fidelity and willingness to disparage competitors on your behalf.
Also, don't give up hope. There's no reason you should need to write more than 10 minutes a day with my technique. If you know Adam's True Fan Leasing Model, you can build an empire like mine – I'll send you videos of me drinking champagne on a rented yacht together with the samples. I've grown so successful from my writing at this point, I just want to share what I've learned.
The book is $19.95. Join me at my Paid Subscriber level of $5/month and it's yours.
Congratulations on Gregorio! I also enjoyed your modern-day Dickens summary. Scenario #1 is very similar to Ruth Reichl’s The Paris Novel, but instead of a graveyard she is given a designer dress and told to go to a restaurant where she meets her rich old widower who finds her creatively irresistible because she eats oysters with as much gusto as his late wife who also wore that dress.
For a wealthy patron who will fund my work, I am ready to relocate to the Mariana Trench or sell my soul to the devil. Yk, the whatever-it-takes attitude.
I'm not sure about the first route to finding a wealthy recluse, I joined a local cemetery friends group for just this reason (of course I claim to want to protect the cemetery as a historical greenspace) and have yet to find my wealthy recluse
I would love to be an ornamental hermit 🤣 I would want my wealthy recluse to home me in Egypt, perhaps in a houseboat so I can drift up and down the Nile, camera in hand, creating photographic masterpieces of ancient wonders.
PS, my GCSE English would have been much easier if Dickens had adopted your suggested style of writing ... 🤓
Ah, when I saw 'wealthy recluse' I was thinking the elderly spinster (or widow?) in Grand Hotel Budapest. Gregorio sounds like a catch though. Fabulous article.
I am looking for something Scottish and windswept where I have to tend to some sort of eerie cemetery and I keep getting visions in mirrors, but in a like, cheerful way. Got any of those up Georgio’s sleeves ?
“The times? Mid.” Made me laugh out loud. Thank you.
Forgot to mention that my ideal recluse would look like George Clooney, David Gandy or Glen Powell and would relocate me to Paris, Lake Como, or Bali. I'm not picky. TIA.
Thanks! And yes, I forgot to mention, a wealthy recluse need not be older, they can be a young up-and-coming Hollywood A-lister like Glen Powell -- dream big!!
Best line 😂
Me too!
Ornamental hermit was on my original list of careers but the schools careers adviser said the market was pretty much flooded and I’d be better off going into retail. Sorry about the roundworm. If you want to hook me up with Gregorio’s network I can pay you back with a pair of sneaky sandals. Also, Dickens. Mid. Thank you.
It's never too late to pivot to ornamental hermiting! I'll gladly set up you with a wealthy noble in exchange for those sandals -- the Ivermectin is doing a number on my liver
Excellent, send me directions by pigeon.
Dear Mr. Greaves,
How about this instead: I will lease you one of my 377 $100K True Fans at 6% interest. We can start at 10 years and go adjustable rate thereafter. He will be a perfect fit for your unique chuckle to laugh-out-loud (C-LOL) ratio.
Note that I write "he" not because there aren't "she's" available – there's a bevy – but because I have a True Fan in mind that I sense is growing a bit weary of my writing. It's important to have a feeling for this if you want to grow your business into anything resembling my own.
If desired, I can send you complete samples of "his" True Fan comment writing style along with a personality assessment that considers relationship commitment, fidelity and willingness to disparage competitors on your behalf.
Also, don't give up hope. There's no reason you should need to write more than 10 minutes a day with my technique. If you know Adam's True Fan Leasing Model, you can build an empire like mine – I'll send you videos of me drinking champagne on a rented yacht together with the samples. I've grown so successful from my writing at this point, I just want to share what I've learned.
The book is $19.95. Join me at my Paid Subscriber level of $5/month and it's yours.
Hmmm...this sounds suspiciously like an MLM...fuck it, I'm in!
Wealthy Recluse sounds so much better than "Sugar Daddy." You are a genius.
It's all about branding!
The Dickens extract is a pretty clear example of what you get when you're trying to satisfy 100000 different subscribers all at once.
That’s great!
My thoughts exactly!
“Plus, Gregorio insists on paying me in untraceable Italian bearer bonds, which can only be cashed in at the Central Bank of Italy.”
🤣🤣🙏
Congratulations on Gregorio! I also enjoyed your modern-day Dickens summary. Scenario #1 is very similar to Ruth Reichl’s The Paris Novel, but instead of a graveyard she is given a designer dress and told to go to a restaurant where she meets her rich old widower who finds her creatively irresistible because she eats oysters with as much gusto as his late wife who also wore that dress.
That is way creepier, but, I mean, if it pays the bills...
It’s always the dead wife’s dress. A bit creepy.
For a wealthy patron who will fund my work, I am ready to relocate to the Mariana Trench or sell my soul to the devil. Yk, the whatever-it-takes attitude.
I like your can-do attitude! I'll let Gregorio's buddies know
I appreciate you.
So funny - it’s been a while since I enjoyed something so funny and so well done.
I haven't tried this brilliant approach, but I can confirm The One Extremely Patient Spouse model pays off.
Arguably even better than a wealthy recluse!
That made me laugh.
I'm not sure about the first route to finding a wealthy recluse, I joined a local cemetery friends group for just this reason (of course I claim to want to protect the cemetery as a historical greenspace) and have yet to find my wealthy recluse
Don't worry, it's only a matter of time!
I would love to be an ornamental hermit 🤣 I would want my wealthy recluse to home me in Egypt, perhaps in a houseboat so I can drift up and down the Nile, camera in hand, creating photographic masterpieces of ancient wonders.
PS, my GCSE English would have been much easier if Dickens had adopted your suggested style of writing ... 🤓
Houseboat on the Nile sounds lovely! I'm sure we can find you a wealthy Egyptologist
Ah, when I saw 'wealthy recluse' I was thinking the elderly spinster (or widow?) in Grand Hotel Budapest. Gregorio sounds like a catch though. Fabulous article.
I hope someone fact checks this piece!
(I hope no one fact checks this piece.)
I am looking for something Scottish and windswept where I have to tend to some sort of eerie cemetery and I keep getting visions in mirrors, but in a like, cheerful way. Got any of those up Georgio’s sleeves ?
The Scottish countryside is recluse heaven! I guarantee Gregorio can find you someone.
Brilliant.